Balance

Pls pardon my poorly organised sharing. I feel very sick today but I was so compelled to write something about this issue that is in my heart. My train or thoughts is not as sharp as when I am well. Then again, my train of thought has never been very sharp anyway. hahahaa...

"We gotta have a "balanced" spiritual life"

That's a very common phrase that I have heard in church. What exactly do they mean by "balanced"? According to the explanation of those who always say that, it means to have equal amount of the word as well as experience with the Holy Spirit. If I put it in an equation, it would probably look like this:

Word + Experience = "Balanced" Spiritual life

One pastor said that some people need more of the Word, others need more of the experience as both needs all leads to the same thing: a closer relationship with God. I think this enrty would not be balanced (no pun indended) if we do not define what do different people mean when they say "experience".

Most Charismatic and Pencacostals seems to define it as manifestation of the gifts such as tongues, healing and all the other stuff mentioned in Paul's epistles as well as a flood of emotions that leads to crying or euphoria. It also includes the non-biblical manisfestation of shaking, laughing and falling backwards. (Defination is mine)

According to my own reading, and this is the stand I know take, an experience is the regenerating work of the Holy Spirit that leads to a changed life that doesn't live to satisfy the desires of the flesh but to satisfy God. It also leads to greater love for Christ abd a lesser desire to serve the flesh through obedience in according to Scriptures. These are compelling evidence of our faith.

Having the gifts of the Spirit or showing great emotions in worship doesn't prove that we are Christians just as going to Burger King makes us Whoppers because they do not show that we love God more. The greatest prove of our salvation is when we are transformed to glorify Christ above all else; making Christ the centre of our lives. Yes, our lives and all of it; to be consumed in our hearts with a passion to glorify Christ above all else. Living a life transformed by the Lord is the only experience that we all need. It's by our testimony of our changed life that others see Jesus and not in the gifts that we received. Thus a "balanced" spiritual life is a result of having Faith in God through the Word:

Word + Faith = "Balance" Spiritual life

I do not think that God has done away with the gifts of the spirit, but it's definitely not in the way that is being preached and practiced in most churches today. God can still do exceedingly and abundantly more that we can imagined, but His way to Salvation has always been the same. 4000 years ago, the message to Moses and Isreal was to obey Yaweh. 2000 years when Jesus preached, the word was the same. 2000 years later, today, the message is still echoes through out the world. Is God doing a "new" thing? Yes He will, coz the events of the Olivet Discourse (Mattt 24, Luke 19) hasn't been fulfilled, but the message has always been the same.

Very Anger

A production house hired me for a two day shoot and cancelled it at the very alt minute. The producer forgot to informed me coz he assumed that the cameraman will informed me and he conviniently gave my job to another guy. I told Ivan about it coz he was with me and he asked me to demand a certain form of compensation. But didn't state that when I agreeed on the job, so I didn't think I should do it. But I did make my feelings known to him. It's so frustrating when u have work and stuff planned and they cancel without informing u. Yes, I am understanding, he did apologise for his oversight, but I just want to let him know lah. Very anger when I think about it. That is why I am blogging today, if not I'll be shooting somewhere near little india.

Anyway, it's been a good week. God's been good in providing work including the one that was cancelled. I didn't let it affect me a lot. No work means more time to spend with the Lord. So I am not that angry lah. Just want to express a little on this blog of mine.

Oh, I remixed "Sad" and the artiste name has been changed from TOSOG to CFS. It's CFS (feat Vananny).

If u want to listen to it, pass me a CD-R or msn me. hahaha...

LAstly, I hope u guys will be free on 18th Sept'05. There is this local film that I worked on and I thought it was a good one to watch. It's called Unarmed Combat. It's in Mandarin. If u can make it, leave me a comment. Details are here below. Or click here.

Venue: Singapore History Museum
Date: 18 Sep, 8pm (as the closing film of Asian Film Symposium)
Tix at $5, go on sale at the Substation from 1 Sep

COme ah! Come Ah!

Moving on to maturity

"Babyhood is a delightful thing; perpectual babyhood is deplorable"
-Leonard Ravenhill

I had 3 conversations with 3 diff youths yesterday and today. All of them have been in church all their lives and I could see their state of maturity. Many of them have "faith like a child". I do not doubt their genuine desire to want to worship God and their desire to know Him more. They are still in the infancy of their faith. It's is my prayer that they grow up fast as they drink the pure milk of the Word of God.

Like new born babies, their growth then can truly be accelerated. That's the power of the Holy Spirit. To transform lives and cause them to grow stronger and more into the image of Christ. The apostle Paul urge his readers to move on to maturity because that's the only prove of growth in Christ. It's part of the proccess to become "complete" in Christ. "...we henceforth be no more children, tossed to and fro, and carried about with every wind of doctrine." (Eph 4:14). Such are easily deceived and tricked by crafty preachers.

May we never be comfortable at where we are lest we become stagnant and feel condemned. The power of the Spirit is real and effective and "unless the Lord builds the house" we labour in vain. Let the Word be proven true through it's dealings in our lives.

Johnathan Edwards

During the Great Awakening Edwards was insistent that a genuine work of God the Holy Spirit is known by the way that men and women are drawn to Christ, convinced of his lordship and deity, and shown that Christ alone can save sinners.

The evidence of the Holy Spirit dwelling in us is not tongues for sure (yes I am a pentacostal proclaiming that), but a changed life that is saved by grace thru faith.

Consider this

I always believe that there is a time for everything, but there comes a time when we should just stop telling people that everything is alright, when it's not. Let's forget about trivial matters such as the music we play, the songs we sing, the football club we support or the supper we ate for a while. All these things will wither away, let's take some time to seriously consider what we are doing with our souls.

Revelation 2: 2-5
I know your deeds and your toil and perseverance, and that you cannot tolerate evil men, and you put to the test those who call themselves apostles, and they are not, and you found them to be false;
and you have perseverance and have endured for My name's sake, and have not grown weary.
'But I have this against you, that you have left your first love.
'Therefore remember from where you have fallen, and repent and do the deeds you did at first; or else I am coming to you and will remove your lampstand out of its place--unless you repent.

I heard that there was a really cool altar call at the youth service yesterday. I am glad that we are challenging the youths to ask the real question, "What is the condition of your hearts?"

"To be a Christian is to love the Lord Jesus Christ (John 14:21,23; 1 Cor. 16:22). But the Ephesians’ passion and fervor for Christ had become cold, mechanical orthodoxy. Their doctrinal and moral purity, their undiminished zeal for the truth, and their disciplined service were no substitute for the love for Christ they had forsaken. When God "remove [our] lampstand.", God’s judgment would bring an end to the church" as it eventually did to the Ephesian church. (John MacArthur Study Bible).

May we never be comfortable with where we are are and may Holy Spirit continue to burn in us a passion for the Father, Son and Holy Ghost.

Had a great day yesterday. I taught the Sec 2 cells again this week and I really enjoyed every moment of it. I continued on the lesson I started last week on "Truth and Integrity". Lord, let the truth be planted and cause it to grow in your perfect time.

After that I went for the IBS Obadiah class which was pretty cool. This is the 2nd time that I am attending it. It's only a small minor-prophet book, that is so relavant to us today. It's a book where Obadiah was proclaiming judgement to a poud and lofty land of Edom and it's attitude towards the suffering of the Jews in Jerusalem. They did not attack Jerusalem, but they stood aside, watcha and did nothing. Scripture is very clear that God will bless those who blesses Israel and pronounces a curse on those who curses her. At this age and day, it's very interesting and worrying to see the world's perspective on Israel. I believe that God's word is true and I'll be taking note of the consequences of those who are not blessing her. This is not a time to say if Israel is right or wrong. Everything seems hazy and bad to Israel right now, but God will use it to accomplish a bigger purpose than the purpose of man. God will again use scripture to show that His word is true and will use Israel as a stage to show his grace to all nations.

Then went to Bernard and Yohanna's baby's 1st month birthday. The whole "Ichtus" cell was there, well, almost. All the babies were there; Faith, Jedidiah and Caven. Then SW and I went to hang out with Clement, Soann and their baby. Each time we hang out we grow fat coz we eat a lot. I life, I am not complaining though, but must exercise lah!

Work

I have work today. I had a great time at KAP before I headed to the shoot, but last night's session on the net had a toll on me after lunch, so tonight I must sleep early. After work, I went to "For His Glory" shop at International Plaza. I had a great time talking Chew and his wife. They are such a great blessing and great encourager.

I also have work tomorrow and Friday. Friday shoot is a documentary at Ubin. I'm gonna be there thru the night and will return on Sat morning.

Praise God! Thanks to those who prayed for me! It's been great for the past 2 days, I hope tomorrow will not be any different.

IBS

I went for IBS today after a long time. I was so surprised when Cecilia (perh, not Lai) came up to me and handed me the new workbook for her structured-analysis workshop and gave me a quick run through on the changes she made and how she made it easier for students to understand about struturing. SW and I attended it last year but we only went for the 1st day. But Cecilia remembered! I was very blur at first, but as she went on explaining, the interest in me began to grow. She did that in about 5 minutes just before she started the class. I was so thankful for her thoughtfulness. I really needed the kick in my butt to start doing something. I prayed for it, but I was so shocked by the manner in which it came. Hahaha... in 5 minutes! I know it was a start of something for me.

It's not coincidence that she gave me the new workbook. It's also not the first time she reminded me about it. I remembered that she invited me to attend the workshop a few months ago. I am really touched by the gesture! It's also no coincidence that today's lesson was dealing with some of the sins that I am facing. It was so timely. It was a great day of revival for me. It's one little victory of a very long war to uphold and to teach the truth.

Thinking of the events of the day:

1) The QT
2) The Prayer
3) E-swords
4) xxxWatch pact I made with Daniel
5) Cecilia's Structured Analysis "lesson"
6) The lesson she taught at the session today

All of the above have one common denominator. I know I have to carry on where today left off. I must remember my resolutions. They all point to my vision and direction that I felt the Lord is leading me. They are confirmation. I told SW, I have "no horse to ride away from" this time.

I am still praying...

e-Sword Bible Software

This is from an excellent blog http://wooq.blogspot.com/ and I really want to share it with u esp if u have been looking around for a bible-study software. May be it's been around for a long time and I haven't noticed until this blogger introduced it. Nonetheless, here it is. Enjoy!

I am using this Bible software called e-Sword, which can be downloaded at http://www.e-sword.net/. This software is written by Rick Meyers who has decided to distribute it for free. So far, e-Sword has been a tremendous help with regard to my Bible studies. The default installation comes with the King James Version w/ Strong's numbers and the Strong's dictionary. I have further downloaded a couple of more excellent free add-ons.

Awesome in Senja!

That place in Blk 629 Senja Road, 24-194, Singapore 670629 because God is in da house! I mean God is omni-present, so I did my QT at home today. It was awesome! Then I prayed for some things that are burdening me and I felt really great and satisfied that I did it! I hope I have the discipline to do it tomorrow.

My QT is based on the book "Hard to believe" by John MacArthur. He pointed out Paul's humble 5 point gospel strategy based on 2 Corinthians 4:1-16.

1. We will not lose heart (v1)

We don't give in to evil and we don't lose courage. We will not become fainthearted, we will not crumble under this treatment because in our crumblign, we are useless to God. Yet God is our strength in our weakness, so the cry echoes on, "Don't lose heart!"

2.We will not alter the message (v2)

The gospel is hard to believe and many will not want to do as Jesus commanded them to do, i.e. giving up their rights to their lives and giving them over to God totally and unreservedly.

3. We will not manipulate the results(v3-4)

Because we understand that a profound spirititual reality is at work in those who do no believe. They are blinded by the "god of this age" and changing the message, manipulating the emotions or the will, is useless. Thus these people cannot believe unless God grants them understanding.

4. We will not expect popularity (8-12)

We shouldn't expect popularity. The pure message of the gospel is an offense to this the present age. People will call us crazy or "too legalistic" for obeying the Word of God, but I rather offend those people who reject the real message than to manipulate the message to make myself approved among them. Paul was always ready to die for the sake of the gospel because he knew it's such an offence back then and it is not different today.

5. We will not be concerned with visible earthly success but devote our efforts toward that which is unseen and eternal (14-16)

We're not concerned with the temporal and transient. Our success isn't measured in hours, or even centuries. Our focus is fixed on eternity!

My Broken China

I am inspired by Jeanie to write about China. Her titles was "I haven't forgotten China". Then some I suddenly thought of some silly idea for a song. It's called "My Broken China" So this is a tribute to my EA team-mates!

I love to see the smile u wear upon you face
I'm glad to know everything between us is ok
I'll cook for you and sing for you
And I'll even dance if you want me too
Kiss me and hold me and never let me go
I hope u are prepared for the shock I'm giving you

I broke your mothers favourite china
It was an accident if u consider
I was jumping while I'm listening
To the music of Nirvana
I thought I reached that state of mind
Until I saw your mother's face
"Oh my precious china!"

A Hymn

Give me a confidence I need to face each passing day
A chance to see Your pow'r at work in me in everyway
Do not be far from me in times my witness fails
But keep me clinging to the cross and guide me while I'm here

The prodding in my heart reveals a hunger in my soul
The life You gave I dare not waste because it's not my own
Grant me the strength to trust in You in everything I do
Let every action, every thought and word bring glory to You

Calm

From "Lead me" by Delirious and "Every New Day" by Five Iron Frenzy.

Lead me to the cross where we first met
Bring me to my knees so we can talk
Let me feel your breath
Let me know you're here with me
Oh Leade me
To the place I belong

Dear Father I need You
Your strength my heart to mend
I want to fly higher every new day again
Here's my heart, let it be forever Your's
Only You can make every new day seem so new

Making much of what I have

I've been in deep thought. I have not make much of my time to do what I want to do. It's really such a struggle as Paul wrote in Romans 7. Yet I know I mustn't give up, but I want to give up! I want to stop hearing the lies and just escape somewhere where I have a reason not to do what I really want to do. It's so easy to escape from my reality, but I know I'll have a lifetime of regrets.

So what am I doing to my life right now? Is it a wasted life? Some thinks so because their focus is on tangible things. I am not doing the "usual" thing such as working everyday just like any body else. I am not like anybody else, but this cause some difficulty for me as a married man. But God is good, SW has been gracious, but how long can I live in this state? If you ask me what I really want to do, I tell u I don't know. I mean I have a plan, but it's so easy to conform to the patterns of this world. How can I be transformed by the Word if the pull of this world seems so strong? The Word of God is powerful, I do not doubt it at all. I guess I could only pray...

Prayer is so powerful, I wonder why I have not spent time in prayer. I've been doing things, but I have not been praying. If I die today and God showed me that I didn't fulfill my fullest potential, it's most probably in my lack of prayer. I feel so strongly that I lack in this area. I am messing myself up by relying on my own understanding in all things pertaining to my life and the faith. How long can I sustain without prayer? How long can I sustain without agonising over my pathetic life. Why did I try to organize my life when I ought to agonize over it?

Yes! I am not organize because I do not agonize! I must submit to the Lord now. All my lack of self-control is evident. I am losing grip of my destiny. I give up running my life now. I totally give up. I am going to kill my old self today and put on Christ. I am so tired of building sandcastle in the air. Lord, please now, once again, reign in me.

So sure is your love for me

I rejoice in our similarities and I rejoice in our differences. It's a wonder how patient God's love for us is when I see lots of blame in me. One day, perfect we will be when all conflicts shall cease. One day, we'll look back and laugh at our stupidity and wondered how we survived all the verbal slaughter. That one day is better none. If one day is a thousand elsewhere, please multiply our days on the other side.

In times of global conflict
A time when terror reigns
Forget not what we promised
Regret not what we had
As the sun shines over the land
The waves crash over the shore
As the moon orbits our planet
And water fills the sea
So sure is your love for me

At times there will be earthquakes
At times there will be drought
At times there will be famine
At times there will be doubt
As the sun shines over the land
The waves crash over the shore
As the moon orbits our planet
And water fills the sea
So sure is your love for me

When the setting sun turns blood red
When the stars falls from their perch
When the powers of the earth are shaken
When the Kingdom is at hand
As the sun refuses to shine
The waves crashes even more
As the moon falls from the sky
And nothing seems ordinary
So too is your love for me

Cell

I taught two cells today as their CMs were on a study break. I was really apprehensive at first coz I have not really build a repport with them. I was teaching on "Truth and Integrity", but as the lesson went on, I felt the Lord leading and guiding me as I just shared from the word and from my personal testimony which they could relate. I revealed some secrets that was kept in the old closet which I am sure they were quite shock to hear about, but it was all good. The boys were really digging into what I was saying and I am sure they learned something today.

I really missed the cell setting. I am glad I had the chance to do it today.

Privileged

I felt to previleged to jam with Sherwin yesterday because this is the first time I am jamming with someone who really knows what prog rock and metal is about. I mean he doesn't know the genre by name, but he sure knows how to play and I like his attitude and style. Very John Petrucci (of Dream Theatre) and he has ideas that are waiting to explode ot of his systems.

I booked the hall from 3 to 6 but had to stop after only half an hour coz we were a bit too noisy. But we didn't waste our time doing nothing. We chatted and towards the end, came up with some ideas to help us as look forward to the next jam. It's a pity that he has to go NS in Sept, I wish we have more time to do this. My idea of doing this is still hazy. If it works out, I may make this the band I wanna persue. But it's as for now, I just wanna jam. No strings attached, just drum sticks and the guitar man!

This is something I wrote a few years ago. It didn't work for CFS, coz it's a but too heavy. So I think this will work in the metal project.

Scratch

* is the mark of a silent kill
* is the scar that's been lying still
* is the bleeding from your skin
* is something we could leave in pain

* is unpredictable
* it eats it's way to the soul
* is lamenting alone
* has found in you a home

The sigh is loud enough
Your heart screams silently into the twilight
Silence screaming out
Silence within and without

*, reveals the pain
*, the shedding of blood
*, the world stood and watch
*, the sound reverberates

Bridge:
Deep scratches leave scars behind
You can't remove them
Touch and feel them
The pain has left
Cast away in a distant to remind me
Never again

"Heavy Metal Music is Bad..."

"But they'll be better if they practice."
-Larry Norman

I was listening to Project 86 yesterday and was so inspired by their kind of music which reminded me of the great songwritings of Living Sacrifice, Zao, Mortification, Tourniquet and Extol. Since I am jamming with Sherwin later, I thought why don't I contribute some lyrical idea and see what conspire. I look fwd to the jam. It won't be easy, coz I can't double-pedal that fast, neitehr do I have the endurace to do it for long. But now at last is a motivation to kick those pedals, yeah! Practice! Practice! Practice!

Dreaming in the light for far too long
The body is alive while the soul sleeps on
Living on ideas they’ve been spoon-feeding me
The conscience woke up to find me wanting

Crying for something when I know not anything
Craving for something that I cannot see
Our actions were fashioned and shaped by humanity
Moving along with the wave of conformity

There’re things to be done if we want to succeed
The spirit is willing but the body is weak
Too many opinions calling out from both sides
Too many noises but there’s only one choice

Crying for something when I know not anything
Craving for something that I cannot see
Our actions were fashioned and shaped by humanity
Moving along with the wave of conformity

I remained on top of the fence
Without a rhythm, a rhyme or a lamp
Give me the wisdom to understand the season
Give me a light to accompany the reasons

Crying for something that’s been lost in time
Craving for something that eyes cannot see
My ears are open by faith I believe
I won’t move until thy spirit leads

We are something when we are nothing

2 Corinthians 4:7a
"But we have this treasure in earthen vessels..."

The "treasure" is "the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ" (v6) the "earthen vessels" are us. MacArthur said that the term "earthen vessels" doesn't give justice to the original Greek word. In face he said that the word "earthen vessels" or "jars of clay" were too "dignified". So what kind of earthen vessels are these? They are cheap baked clay pot, unrefined, ugly, unbreakable, valueless. It's the little pot in which u put your plants.

God certainly can use vessel of honor for His glory, such as great orators, great singers or great men of great stature and respect, yet Paul doesn't consider himself any of these. His humility and meekness was real, it wasn't for show; he didn't do it to gain favours or position. So real to him was this fact that He didn't dare to steal the glory that only belongs to God and God alone. In comparison to the great glory, we all are nothing. Christ is everything! God wouldn't share his glory with another, but we are joint-heirs with the Father and co-heirs with the Son! We dun have the right to demand it, because it's by grace thru faith that we have it.

I dare not boast about my treasures that lies await in glory, because it's not the treasures that I look forward to. We all should never let that be our motivation to love God. We should also not let the fear of hell be the motivation. Be motivated, but let Jesus Christ be our boast!

I dare not boast about my position in Christ, because I do not worship the position I have in Him, but I boast in Christ who is the lift me up to that position.

I dare not boast of my strength lest I become proud, but I boast of my weakness so that the God will be glorified and more magnified through my life. In everything we do, we must do for Christ and offer thanksgiving to God for every failure and successes because He is supreme over all things and al l things that are and was were all made by Him and for Him!

I dare not steal what is not mine. I have no glory and honor except in Christ. Some think we're foolish to be a enslaved by a narrow mind-set. Well, I did have a chance to choose to walk on the broader road, but I chose to walk the narrow road, because that's the only road that leads to life and as the Bible says, few will find it.

An earthen vessel will be an earthen vessel, it does not evolve into something else, but God takes such vessel and use it as a lamp to shine "the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ." There are many ways God can use us, but one thing I know is that when we are rediculed, God will be glorified when we serve God humbly, boasting only in Him and giving glory to Him in everything we do. Blessed is the man who's trust is in the LORD!

That's really a FOOLzLISH thing to do!

claire's flower shop

When everything seems down and out, and nothing seems to go right. Look at Claire's Flower Shop, old and torn down
Inside is a haven for broken hearted souls
To find solace from the flowers
To all whose heart have grown cold...

Welcome to Claire's Flower Shop

Revival PtII

We had a family BBQ this evening and one of the guest was Keng Kun and his family. Jennifer (SW's sister) and KK's wife were former colleagues. I had a good chat with KK and I am glad to know that he is still so sharp about the things of God. As I shared to him about what I shared earlier about revival, he reminded me that we live in a different world as theirs. Their needs might be different to ours and thus they were more spiritually hungry. He also mentioned that in a country that is predominietly Catholic, they might be influenced by past influences. He added that in order for the experience to be complete, there must be discipleship or at least continual preaching or teaching of the Word of God.

One that KK reminded me about is that as the day of the Lord draws closer, many will be deceived by false teachers and at the other side of the pendulum, more people are turning to Christ. Looking at the trend of today. The people who are being deceived are those in the western countries while revival seems to be happening in the 3rd world or developing nations. Jacob Prasch said that at the height of the toronto-Pensecola "hypestry" in England, while the people are falling, rolling and laughing in the church, more non-christian places of worship are being built. The opposite of what happened in Acts! It's not a real revival where the whole community is being shaken!

I really dunno if revival will happen in Singapore, it seems so impossible, so hopeless, but I will commit to pray for our nation. If the nation seems to be too big a task for u, think about those that u have influence over; your youths in cell, ur friends in school or your family members. Most important of all, yourselves. May we be revived so that we will live the life that God intended for each and everyone of us. I do not have the right to force u to take up my stand on certain issues, but I have the right to challenge u to a closer relationship with the Lord. I do not say this as a personal plea. I do not know if Singapore will have a revival, but I know u can! God bless u and happy birthday, Singapore!

1 John 1:3-4
"We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that you also may have fellowship with us. And our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ. We write this to make ourjoy complete."

EA Trip on my mind

Three weeks ago somewhere on earth there lived three little oriental pigs. Piggie Wan said to Piggie Tu,


"Last one to cross the finish line is a pig!"


Watch us sing and dance as we give our testimony to you at the YA and Youth Service this weekend! Yahoo! Anyway, here are some photos from the trip.

Rachel Choo, Eleena, Rachael Lim and Jeanie. Four of the youth leaders were with us but I was the only guy in the team of nine. CX only realised the mistake ofdeploying the other guy to her group after we split. They had three guys in all. I wasn't complaining, coz I am after zhen(1) Jie(3) to some of them. If u can't become like them, act like them! But what a great team! What a great leader we had in Rachael Lim!


Gideon the iron (he is a barnabas), Jenn the man(duh!), Jeanie our Barnabie(female version of "Barnabas", the son of encouragement), Justin Thinks he is Timberlake(cry me a river)


I've never felt such great peace and quietness before (despite the noisy circada which I kind of like), but the environment was so condusive for doing my devotion. I missed those environment, but I have to make much of what I've got. There ain't many such places in back here.

I had time to practice for TOSGO's Sonicfest set!


The classroom at the first camp where we taught, worshipped and learned from their lifestlye. That's suhui leading a session. This was taken with my Motorola E-398.

Rage and Justin (our team leaders) having a meeting at our first camp. This is a great shot!

Prayer

I shall leave u tonight with a quote from Leonard Ravenhill about prayer. As I was in EA, I knew I had to do this sooner or later. It hit me today. I have to do it! I have no choice! The burden is too great, I cannot bear it! I have to tell to the Lord, I have to let U have it, Lord!

"Poverty-stricken as the Church is today in many things, she is most stricken here, in the place of prayer. We have many organizers, but few agonizers; many players and payers, few pray-ers; many singers, few clingers; lots of pastors, few wrestlers; many fears, few tears; much fashion, little passion; many interferers, few intercessors; many writers, but few fighters. Failing here, we fail everywhere"

Revival

At this morning's leader's prayer meeting, Ps Ronald showed us a documentary entitled "Transformation". It talked about real modern revival that is happening in the world and it's not in Toroto, Pensecola or Singapore. It happened in the most unexpected places according to human standards, but it's the most fertile soil for the harvest. The city it talked about today was Cali, Columbia.

It all started not in celebration, but in tears. It started not in times of prosperity, but at a time when crime rates were high and an average of 15 murders happens everyday before the revival started. Cali is the home of the Cali Cartel. The home of the rich columbian drug lords. People get killed over drugs, it's crazy! It's not a place u'll expect to find more fearful men than faithful men. It's probably a place that u'll least expect to have a revival. And it started with one man who started the revival in himself by repenting and reconciliating with his Evangelical brothers. I do not know if they shared the same doctrinal statements, I dun think that was the issue. The city was in turmoil, it's a time when Christians ought to unite in prayer and make a difference in the city.

One man made the difference because he had the right attitude. It started with personal revial; a personal victory over pride which helped conquer the worse enemy besides the devil, that's his own pride. Broken before the Lord, he reconciled with his fellow evalgelicals and organised prayer meetings (as oppose to celebrations). Thru strategic planning of the churches in Cali, the various regions began to pray for their location. Every part of the city is being prayed for! They repented first then when they have repented, they interceded for the city. Then the newspaper started to print the very words that the Christians were praying about, specifically "Stop Homocide!". The next day, for the first time in the city's history, there were not a single murder!! It didn't end there, the authourities took tough actions and acted against the drug lords and arrested many of them. It didn't end there for the church either. The continue to pray and held meetings. Many people came to know the Lord. It wasn't just in one church alone, but thru strategic planning of the churches in Cali, they prayed and prayed and united in prayer at Stadiums which sits 60,000 people (Full-capacity!). The security personnels had to turn people away, but those who were not allowed in were not dismayed. Did u know what they do? They didn't go home, but instead organised a prayer march around the stadium!! Even the mayor of Cali went up on stage at one meeting to declare that Cali needs Jesus!

So what are signs of real revival?

• It is not short-lived
• Where more tears flowed prior to revival rather than confetti
• It affects the individual first then as a united body, the whole community (Repentance + reconciliation)
• When crime rates really fall
• When the government give u the use of the stadiums for free
• Where authourities truly show favour to Christians
• When all evangelical churches are experiencing growth (not just one church)
• More people attending overnight prayer meetings not a worship celebration (there is a time for it though)
• When Jesus is preached in ernest

Oh, we all really need to repent of our spiritual blindness of the churches in Singapore! Ps Ronald said that Singapore faced a problem that is as bad as Cali. They have a drug problem, we have a luke-warmness problem. The problem is as bad as the drug problem in Cali, me thinks that our problem is probably worse! When u are too comfortable, u think everything is alright. Who would have thought we need to repent? Some Christians will say I am in error by saying we should repent. They advocate that we should thank God for forgiveness and celebrate and "love singpore to God".

I dun care what other churches believes now. I repented for my "pride". Of always speaking my mind without thinking; for putting my shoe into my mouth when I speak. I repent for not praying and complaining. I repent for not praying and interceding for Singapore and R-age when I know I have to! I repent for not taking action.

I repented, now is time for action! Time to pray and intercede. Time for the saints to rise and stop persuing things that rust and moth destroys! Time to seek God! If it's an experience that they want, let it be an experience of a changed life that comes thru the Holy Spirit. To stop seeking the gift, to stop persuing tongues, miracles or healings. Let the greatest gifts be gifts that blesses people and not confuse them; let the greatest "tongues" be ur own native language that's used to speak the truth; let the greatest miracle be the miracle of being lukewarm to being on fire; let the greatest healing be the healing of our hearts and the great crack that has emerged between all believers in the Lord Jesus Christ!

We don't need no special speakers to preach to us! I am sure there is a prophetic voice waiting to call the church to repentance! We don't need no special programmes! We just need some good ol' intercessory prayers to be offered to God on behalf of our city. It starts with one person and that's ourselves. I hope there are many other like-minded people in Singapore. It's now time to show real spiritual hunger.

The crowd and queue outside the indoor stadium at the weekend should not be a barometer to measure our spiritual hunger. Let us not be deceived. Let's continue to pray and wait. I will pray and I will wait!

Ps Ronald said one statement that surprised me. He said that the initial evidence of the "baptism of the Holy Spirit" (since we're pentacostal, allow us to use our lingo) is not speaking in tongues... but a changed life!" He later came to pray for me that though I may not speak in tongues, God will continue to help me in my growth as I continue to change for His glory!

Lord, is this a sign? Is this the start gun that u have fired for us to start off the starting block?

The sprint has begun! Yes, it's not a jog in the park, it's a sprint! We're running for our dear lives! We are running as if our lives depended on it! We run like never before! I suddenly feel the need to speed up! Speed up to pray and to intercede! Hurry up to wait upon the Lord!!

Claire's FLower Shop Re-opened

We reopened the shop at 12pm this afternoon without any fanfare. It was just 3 good ol' buddies having the time of their lives jamming and coming up with crazy ideas after so many months! I like the idea that we have on the old songs. The creative juices were oozing out of us as we played new ideas and thought of ways to make the old ones sound nicer. And we crap a lot! It's so good to be in their company to do what I do best. Eh, I am a natural, ok?

I must say this, for the first time (and I am so proud to say this), I felt that Jon has really gotten the "emo" feel in his playing. I was in the mood when he played variations of the same progression, when we were just building to a clumax. It was so cool! Man, now we are so "gian" for the next jam.

Liang now has more efx. The Recluse stint has really helped him tremendously! Now I think people will say to him when CFS plays, "Ain't u the guitarist frm Recluse?" Speaking of that, Jon has this remark said to him, "Aren't u the drummer from Gloria?" I think their eyes got stamp!

May God is glorified thru our gifts!

Preach it!

Experience (through worship where non-christians present) can never take lead in a salvation experience. The bible speaks it is God's Words that will divide rightly into our soul and convict. Not worship :)

From Big Bird

Sand flies Chiak french flies!

French Flies chiak kao sai!

Forgiveness

I have a lot of sand fly scars. I forgive those bugs, but I can never forget them lest I get bitten again. So we learn from our past. The scars are there, but it hurts no more.

Now Sand flies can go jiak Sai!

It's works!

Many of you know that I am crazy about Hillsongs and Delirious as any of those who went to FOP. I know that there is a genuine desire to see revival happening in our nation with the help of talented brothers and sisters overseas. There is really nothing "really wrong" with FOP if u ask me again. I'll encourage u to go. I can go, but I won't.

May be the biggest reason is this.

2 John 8-11
8Watch yourselves, that you do not lose what we have accomplished, but that you may receive a full reward.
9Anyone who goes too far and does not abide in the teaching of Christ, does not have God; the one who abides in the teaching, he has both the Father and the Son.
10If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, do not receive him into your house, and do not give him a greeting;
11for the one who gives him a greeting participates in his evil deeds.

We must be cautious of false prophet. The false prophetr I talked about is earlier, though many in our denomination believe he is a great man of God, he is a man of deception and error. The verse above talks about not associating ourselves with false prophets or the prople who are influenced by them. Those that hangs out with false prophets have part of him in them!

All glory belongs to Jesus. There will come a time when "every knee shall bow and every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord" (emphasis added) and not everyone who does that will be a believer in Christ. That day when even the unbelievers will proclaim might be the day when Jesus returns as He descends upon Jerusalem in a cloud. There is no denying Him now and it'll be too late for a lot of people as well. In the same way, FOP will have Christians of everykind. The music and the whole vibe will do them a lot of good, but if the Lord is not present in that meeting, time will tell. I don't believe that this is a time to preach a "feel-good" message or sing a "God loves me" song. It's time to shake the church and to shake our lives to live more in awe and more in the holiness of God that is acceptable in Christ Jesus.

If the heart of God's people is far away, God is deaf to all the music and praise.

Amos 5:21-24
21"I hate, I reject your festivals,
Nor do I delight in your solemn assemblies.
22"Even though you offer up to Me burnt offerings and your grain offerings,
I will not accept them;
And I will not even look at the peace offerings of your fatlings.
23"Take away from Me the noise of your songs;
I will not even listen to the sound of your harps.
24"But let justice roll down like waters
And righteousness like an ever-flowing stream.

If you felt really good last night. I hope u'll feel the same way tonight, but do not fall into the trap of a good trip and forget about the greater reason for the celebration. It's near national day, it's a day to pray for revival in Singapore. Unless we call on Jesus and work at it with fear and trembling, then revival will come.

Take away the good songs and the talented people, can the Word not change us? Music and Songs cannot become first. However Paul did say we are to encourage each other with hymns and spiritual songs (which I believe are the aim of hillsongs and Delirious which I am grateful for), but do we need more songs now? Does a building of people dancing, weeping means revival is here? No revival is here when more and more people love God, His people and His Word. The gathering of a great crowd is insignificant if that focus is shifted.

There is not hype in holiness, only despair because thru God's holiness we see our ugliness of our sin. Without Christ, we are utterly useless! Oh to love Christ is to embrace the cross and to embrace the cross is to accept that no CHristian life is an easy life. It's not easy to deny ourselves, to give up everything even unto death for Christ. But that's exactly what the gospel is about. God or nothing! A life of holiness or hopelessness. Praise God for the Spirit that dwells in us that is able to help us and back us up when we need most. Oh, Lord give us passion, give us understanding! Give us uction! Give us revival!

Miracles!

But God can still make a difference there this weekend.
Take away the hype, people! Dun tell me how great that worship is or wadeva, but tell me what I want to hear! Tell me what God wants to hear!

We have power and prayer night today. I hope many will go to church instead of the Indoor Stadium coz the place with the least hype, has the most power!

Not going to FOP!

I remember my first FOP in 1990. The Worship Leader was some unknown fella and the stadium was only 3/4 filled. Then later when Bob Fitts and Hillsongs came, the stadium is always filled! That is why I give it a miss for the past few years. All the hypestry is making me sick. The last of such even was the National overnight prayer meeting at the Indoor Stadium in 97. That was something. There was no hype, just local pastors and the Trinity Christian Centre band leading worship. That was something! The people there were really going for it!

I mean if u get blessed, it's cool, but not for me. Since FOP is always on National Day time, why don't we have local worship leaders. Then we see if people will still flock to the stadium as a body of Christ to worship and seek his face! If there is queue at stadium just to really pray for revival without delirious, hillsongs, then I'll join in the queue with those serious Jesus Freaks! I believe this year is going to be so overly hyped that the music will just carry the people over. I do hope I am wrong.

I am a huge fan of Delirious and Hillsongs, but for an event like FOP. God should be the foucs followed by our nation. And they can invite me to sing anytime! If I go to FOP this weekend, I will definitely be affected because of my presumption. I feel very strongly about it.

Do I not want revival? May be this will be it? Do u think so? Do u really think so? Benny Hinn said Revival will come to Singapore, well I believe that, not because Benny said so, but because other believers and I pray for it! Benny Hinn prophecised in 1990 that in that decade, God will destroy all the homosexuals in the US. See what had happened since. Does that make him a false prophet? Did I make that up? I heard it myself from a audio recording of him saying it! Why do I suddenly talk about him since he is not going to be at FOP? Well, Do u know who are in the FOP committee??

I rest my case...

In You

I wrote this song for a particular person who went off course and heading for destruction. I wrote this to tell him that no matter how screwed up he was, I will still accept him as who he is, a dear brother to me.

This song is a song from a very human perspective. When we come before God, we want God to remember us the way we were before we fall away just as we want a lover to love us the way they loved us before. We wondered if God would accept us again. There is always a fear of rejection and our emotions would sometimes play the dirtiest mind-trick on us. The truth is this, God knows those who are His. And those who are His knows His voice and returns. He alone changes our status from sinner to saint and when we fall and return back to the Master, He restores us (parable of the prodigal son).

Praise God! My brother is making a comeback! I've yet to sing him this song.

Dun change your opinion of me when I am down on my knees
I already know I was wrong so I come to bow down
But things that has entangled me
Tried to shift me from someone I could be
I heard You call my name
Out of nothing you gave me a chance to...
Believe in You

Dun change your opinion of me when I am down on my knees
I already know I was wrong so I come to bow down
And now I know I had to change
I had to rearrange my whole life messed up
I thought that no one cares
Out of nothing you gave me a chance to...
Believe in You

(Tonight I lay my head on bed of nails
My mind is spinning but my life's a sail
I wonder what went wrong
Admit it's all my fault
The dream has gone and all is laid to waste
Forget the plans I had and run from them
Forsake the call I know she called again
But now the feelings numb
I think I'm going dumb
I never thought that all good things would end)

In You I find my peace
In You I find my place to be
It doesn't matter what I've been
You're always there to share my pain
I found love in You
I found it hard to not believe
What you said in Your words
I believe that it's strange but it's true

Words and Music from The Other Side of Glory

Dear Friend

1. Nice to meet you my old friend
Haven’t met since last November
Pitch a tent and we can spend the night
Hear laughter and nonsense again

2. Nice to see you once again
Cross the line and start to wonder
Do you feel better as the days go by?
Hear whispers of freedom, a sigh…

How would you feel
To lose your rights
Peace be your guide
You don’t live twice

3. What do you think about that
They have promise all the people
Fifty years of freedom, what else then
The whispers of freedom is dead

What would you do
Don’t cry all by yourself
You’re not alone
The world weeps with you

4. I can empathise my friend
Tried to put your shoes on my feet
No one wants to live in misery
I do hope my worries are wrong

Words and Music from The Other Side of Glory

What did you see in me

This song, esp at the 2nd verse, never cease to cause me to tear a little because I am nothing, I really am nothing! With all the little significance I have to the world, I am significant to SW. The reason why I feel so significant is because of God and SW's love is a worship unto God as she reflects God's love for me.

What did you see in me
Did I meet your expectation
Have I let you down
Sometimes I am an imitation
If I ever fail you
You know I never meant to hurt you
Like the days of our youth
Trusting love's forgiving notion

Chorus
Though I've come so far
You never ask me why
(Why should you come so far with me)
When I fall apart
You never criticise
(You don't have to live in misery)

Are you proud of me
Standing on the world so tall
Can you feel my pain
Sinking to the ocean floor
Have I ever told you
Seeing you could make me weak inside
Since the days of our youth
I still love you like I did before

Chorus

Words and Music from The Other Side of Glory

Love song

Spring, Summer and Snow
Spring time after that
Never seen you here before
It was then you became my friend
I'll dream on again

Look there's so much
Songs to be sung
Never heard them all before
It was when we were more than friends
I hope it will last

Look there's so much
Things to be done
Rain falls on the good and bad
Knop I learned to live without regrets
It's not that bad

Sunrise
Sunset
Moonlight express
The stars stayed in their places
As sure as I am with the sunrise
So you will rise with me

Words and music from The Other Side of Glory

Mr Misery

This an old idea that was given new life. I orginally wrote the first 5 lines about 10 years back. The inspiration to complete the song are from friend's blog (too many depressed people) and stavesacre.

Mr Misery, walking miserably
Feeling depresso
Drinking Expresso
Where are the stuff to take u high?
What are the reasons you deny?
Within yourself it burns the question why
You brought the misery to yourself

Mr Misery, living aimlessly
Fighting with shadows
Next of the windows
There isn't a need to hate yourself
There is a way out from all the shame
Just ask yourself
When was the time you last considered
There was a man who died to save ya
Within yourself I hope the question fuels your passion
To know deep down inside there is a way out from all the misery
Mr Misery, you can be happy

Words and music from The Other Side of Glory

Are u have fun?
Are u enjoy?
Rock never death!
\o/

Restored

Praise God!!

My confidence in You have been restored thanks to your blessed assurance in Your word and thru ur servants whoes books have been really helpful in reminding me what a great and wonderful God You are!

Halellu Jah!

Something strange

I feel something strange in me. Sometimes it's hard to explain. Is it spiritual, emotional or just plain dumb? I sometimes feel the later...

Hahaha... I feel so strange...

Something is definitely happening. I've been thinking a lot... A lot... Quite a lot...

Hardened Hearts

If the Lord gave us His life, why couldn't we give up ours for His sake? This is because the cares of this world has blinded our eyes and our hearts have been hardened. Like voices carried in the wind, it bounces off the rocks and exist only as far as it's initial force could carry in the form of an echo. That's what the Word of the Lord has become for a lot of us, mere echoes that we hear ringing in our ears as it bounces of hardened hearts.

Yet there is nothing you can do about it, because that is the nature we are born with. In our own strength, it's impossible to be set free unless the power of the Holy Spirit breaks the hardeness of your heart and create a new heart in you, then can salvation be secured.

Once you have tasted the goodness of God, you'll never want to taste anything else. It's Jesus or nothing!

"The house is being robbed, its very walls are being digged down, but the good people who are in bed are too fond of the warmth, and too much afraid of getting broken heads, to go downstairs and meet the burglars; they are even half vexed that a certain noisy fellow will spring his rattle, or cry, 'Thieves!'"

-Charles Spurgeon

Down-Graded faith?

http://www.spurgeon.org/downgrd.htm

While I am still reading about what Calvinism is all about I cannot avoid this website, esp this article written by Uncle MacArthur jr.

Read about it. U may not be Calvinistic, but hear what this controversey was about and judge for yourselves if it is happening to the state our own church bearing in mind that the objective of this article is not a call to "seperate ourselves" from our church, but as Christians hoping to uphold the truth, may it challenge you to know the truth!

There is no compromise...

A reflection of my playing days with Gloria

Just as the last show with them at Sonic Fest was short due to rain delays (we only did 3 songs), my stint with the band was short and sweet.

Yes, that band can go places and to those places they will go if they continue to abide in the Lord.

Soli Del Gloria

Work Ethics of a Record Producer/ soundman, wadeva...

This is a great work ethic I learned from POD's experience with legendary producer Glen Ballard:

From day one working with Glen was a magical experience. His humility, creative ideas, work ethic, studio environment - it all inspired us and lifted the songs to the next level. He has tremendous concern for the craft and for each detail. Each day, Glen arrived at the studio BEFORE us and was there AFTER we left. He never interrupted our time to take a phone call... in fact, we never saw him on the phone once! He never had a bad word or negative attitude about anything. The sessions were strictly about being positive and capturing the most powerful creative moment.

When I First Trusted You

Well, I thought I depended upon You. At least that used to be what was happening with me. In those times of our first sweet communion, nothing got in Your way. I heard Your voice everyday when I trusted You. Gave my life to You. When I trusted You.

Well, there's something that needs to be cleared up. I feel so sorry inside that my first love has died. Cause I've tried in my own strength to follow. When I've known all along, I just couldn't go wrong, if I'd only trusted You. Gave my life to You. When I trusted You.

Keith Green

This is a reflection of my prayer to God this morning. Everysince I returned from EA, I've not been faithful. I kept trying to find that atmosphere to have my quiet time, but the more I search for one, the more frustrated I become. The more frustrated I become the more disillusioned I become. This was evident in my temperament and my attitude towards others. SW was right when she said I have a "tzo bo" attitude. I was slacking so much that I didn't even clean the house when I am home for two afternoons last week. I must admit, the past 7 days since I returned were all wasted days. They were wasted not because I wasn't working. They were wasted because I simply did nothing but slack. While taking a rest is nothing wrong, but I know I was doing nothing worthwhile. I wasn't reading as must as I wanted to, I wasn't praying as must as I wanted to and I wasn't faithful as much as I wanted.

The cares and the worries of this world really overtaken me to the brink of total defeat. I found a little comfort last Saturday at Sonic Festival, but it didn't satisfy my longing to be satisfied. I know that I'll be most satisfied if God is most glorified in me, but what a wretched man I am! I wasn't even glorifying God in thought or action! I just let my mind wander and lose sight of my goal. Then yesterday I met an old FSV mate and he was telling me how busy he was and for the first time in years I felt envious. If there weren't many people at Jurong Point, I'd have broken down in repentance at the escalator where that thought came to my mind. Where was the trust that I have always talked about; the trust that God will provide for the righteous. I never doubted the blood of Jesus that has covered me, but at that moment of carelessness, I allowed the cares and worries of this world blind me from the purpose I am created for (i.e. to glorify and to enjoy Him forever). How can I rejoice and thank God for His forgiveness when I am living in sin (as some Christians are saying today, thus taking away the need to ask for forgiveness after salvation. They believe that Christians asking God for forgiveness are doubting His grace)? How hypocritical am I if I am living in sin and yet rejoicing in Him? The Holy Spirit always points us to our sin first. It's when I began to get rid of the sin in my life which I thought were gone, then I began to taste victory again. How God hates sin! How the Holy Spirit convicts us to repent and renew our minds everytime we sin! That is grace! God could just let us go, but His grace is so great and vast that He will never let those who bear His name shame His name!

Now that's what it means when they say "Perseverance of the saints". God is indeed able to keep us from falling, those who are truly born-again. We may sin, but we will never again live in sin, but when we do fall, we get back up and the power of the Spirit of God will continue to change us. We get closer to the grave with each passing day, but with each step closer to the grave, I feel more of the evidence of God's grace over me for without the Holy Spirit, I am not even able to live a holy life. The opposite of this is also true. If we are not living in Christ, one step closer to the grave means a step closer to the fires of hell. But God can snatch out of that path! God can do it and God has called some of us to persuade others to walk the narrow road.

Fill me now with confidence to walk closer to You

I can never make it through if You didn't lead the way

For You O Lord are my only hope