Yearning for peace
Not that I am experiencing turmoil and thus needed peace, but rather I need peace in my heart for the fear that something might unexpectedly screw up.
I hung out with my former cell-members Jialiang, Joshua and Shawn at West Mall on Saturday. It's good to see that they have matured and although they are at different spiritual maturity, I am thankful to God for the opportunity to speak into their life still. Thank God the guys are still meeing Victor for bible-study on a regular basis. That gives me a blessed assurrance that they are in good hands. One of them yearns for the peace that many other Christians experience. Some of these kids have given their all in their call of duty in ministry. Yet the tragic part of such ministrry is the burn out and the personal struggle these young leaders face in their own encounters that they advocate to those they are lookin after. Thus instead of finding the peace that the Lord promises (in good and bad times), they stumble after some time (it might take years to realise that). Suddenly they realised (like of my boys) that serving God is not just about being outwardly 'on fire" that a youth is expected to be. They sense something lacking and that something has to do with what Paul mentioned in Corinthians about moving from spiritual milk to meat. I am delighted that they have this struggle now. No, I am not a sadist and I would't want anyone filled with any burdens, but certain realisations are God-given. The sudden urge to want to go beyond their young faith towards maturity led them to realise that they have to move on. It doesn't mean they are incomplete in Christ. They are as complete as the jigsaw puzzle framed and hanging on the wall. But there are stages in our spiritual life that we must show if we call ourselves Christians. The work of the Holy Spirit compels us to draw close to God. It is not a mere experiece that we experience in our charismatic/ pentecostal services. It is also to be drawn like the fathers of our faith like Martin Luther was drawn to God - to the Scripture.
One of the boys decided that his past experiences and fire were all a fluke, but I affirmed him that it wasn't. That was his faith as a child. Just like I don't expect Chia Ee to read my NASB bible and understand a single thing I read to him, but he delights in the pictures and colours of his toddler's bible. Do I condemn him for showing irreverence to God's word? Of course not! I ended our get-together by encouraging him to reconcile what he had, the experiential faith that he has to what he has yet to receive, namely to have faith that praises the Lord at all times and the opening of his eyes to the power of the Word of God by praying. Praying and yearning for peace that will one day flood their hearts with the blessed assurance that they are fully and assuredly in Christ and Christ in them in whatever circumstances they face.
Last night was the wrap party of Sayang Sayang. It's confirmed, I can't sing! Not in my own recordings let alone a KTV. But I dun care, I'll still do it anyway and let everyone have a good laugh. I am now inspired to write a song like Phil Collin's "I can't dance" and will call it "I can't sing" or "Even the crow sings better than me". What a great emo title!
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