Burdened

The morning prayer time yesterday was awesome. Samantha, Matthew, Grace Ng, Rachoo, Yiting, Suhui and I were there. There were tears-soaked-prayers for the youths. We prayed mainly for the spiritual condition of our youths that they may come into a more personal relationship with God. In short, we prayed for revival. You know how we sometimes try to manipulate a service and build up the climate into frenzy and think that revival has come. Then months down the road, we are back to our old ways again. Real revival tarries. It doesn’t wear off quickly. It affects a generation with a spiritual awakening that causes the hardest heart to cringe, the strongest knees to buckle and the proud person to weep in repentance. When God take that life and turn it around, their attitude towards Him, His Word and His people. Their lives will be a reflection of the inward change. O I pray for such a change! O God! Fall on our service and cause hearts to turn back to you again!

I went home in a rush after the youth service because of some emergency at home (dun worry, it’s not life-threatening). On my way to the MRT with Manrong, she told me that the band did very well. She said that there was a climax in the flow of worship, which I didn’t feel it, coz I was trying to find my rhythm throughout the worship time. Nonetheless if it helped in the service, I’m ok.

Am I really ok about it? So many people in church base their faith on such emotional manipulation. I wonder how many will still feel their faith being strengthened if we didn’t have a full-band set. When I last led worship I was really flattered by the positive comments I get. However I really want to see real change that doesn’t depend on the mood created by music. Faith comes by hearing and hearing of the Word of God. Faith comes to a person whose heart is conditioned by the Holy Spirit not music or any other form of pseudo-religious methods. I asked the Lord to forgive me for leading a worship session that plays to the gallery, i.e. if that’s what they want, they’ll get it. I can deliver what they want because of the way I am. This is why I tend to talk a lot while I lead, coz I believe in preaching and praying people to repentance and not singing them into the Kingdom.

I still believe in the use of music to edify and to evangelize. It’s a gift from God that we should use wisely. It does help in uplifting the spirit of the weary and encouraged the downcast. There is definitely a place for music in the Kingdom of God. Some might even come to faith thru the ministry of music. I do not doubt that. What I am concerned about is the over-dependency on music and what I see as the lack of dependency, trust and knowledge in the Word of God.

We had RL meeting after the service which I managed to attend. Pls pray for me. I want to do a better job next year than this. I really didn’t do a good RL job this year due to my work. There are so many things to learn from all the other RLs. I’ll be taking over Suhui’s region and she has done a great job there. It’s a big shoe to fill, but I look forward to it. Dang, I am never good at being an administrator and now I have to be more organized. “Jenn … organized?” What an oxymoron! Oh, I must pray against that thought! Bring it on!